Hachita to Antelope Wells: The End

Well holy crap I'm done! I quoted all the mileages and days yesterday - although one correction - this year it was 17 days riding with 1 rest day to make 18.  In a following post I'll post more "Stories I heard on the Divide" like I did last year.

The final ride was... easy... as expected. Only 47.63 miles over relatively flat pavement (a slight uphill mostly, to be honest, that just cut the top end of my speed) resulting in 3:13 on bike about travel time from 7:30-11:15am. It wasn't too hot or windy, thanks to a slight overcast.

I took one break at 30 miles to stretch out, but for the most part pushed the ride, trying to figure out what to think about on such a momentus occasion.  I was suprised by how beautiful it was. I was expecting a flat, open desert - which while intresting - I didn't expect to be beautiful. However, this included some very intresting terrain and uplifts, and the morning light played well on the hills.

I mentally went through the whole Divide, as I've done many times before now. Starting in Rooseville last year, I replayed the entire trip in my head, thinking of the terrain, who I met, where I camped, what joys and difficulties I was having, what thoughts were filling me up, and what lessons I was learning.  This late in the trip that process can take over an hour, and about half of my riding was reviewing the trip up until this point.

The Divide was more life-changing for me last year - the lessons harder and more profound - and they were lessons that I continued working on throughout the year break. Last year, when I ended, I said that a goal would be to find a way to have the mental freedom of a tourer, and the ability to think thoughts that take longer than a minute, day, month, or year even when not on a tour. Another goal would be to figure out how to extend time like on a tour, where a day feels like a week, and a week feels like a month, and a month a year.

I sort of achieved those goals, I sort of didn't. Work bullshit didn't make it easy,  and (to borrow a term) samsara kept engulfing me. But, I kept working on it, and I did make progress. One result being that when I returned to the Divide this year the lessons of last year had settled and matured. As I said before, the Divide was just as hard - New Mexico harder - but I was still comfortable. I settled in easily and it felt like home. I've been through some dark times, and I know that I can be broken again, but right now I feel stronger and more at peace then I ever have before. I feel like the world speaks to me through many previously unnoticed voices, and I also feel like I've become much better at listening to it, finding the lessons, and finding the good.

I healed and recharged quite a bit the last few weeks out here, and had great adventures, saw wonderful things, and met wonderful people. I don't know how I feel now that it's over. I've been working on this goal for 5 or 6 years now, and now I've done it.

I have future plans, of course -  The Oregon Outback, The Sierra-Cascades, The New Zealand North to South tour, and of course the Canadian section of the Divide.  The longer ones I hope to bring Andrea along on a tandem.

But, for now, I'm done with this chapter. I feel great, strong, recharged, rested, and ready to be home. I will feel pulled back out here again, I know I will. But, for now, I feel peace. I like that.